I grew up in a home where we celebrated pivotal points in our childhood and one of those was the rite of passage at age twelve. If you are not familiar with a rite of passage, it is a special “ceremony” marking the transition from one place in life to another. At twelve, it was the transition from being a girl to becoming a woman. That birthday was, and will forever be, an incredibly special time in my life where the women whom I most looked up to each gave me a gift that symbolized godly traits that they were praying would develop or continue to develop in my life. I still treasure each of those gifts: the teacup for hospitality, the curio cabinet to remind me to hold on to each treasured moments the Lord gives, the Bible my parents gave me that is now so lovingly worn, the praying hands necklace to remind me to continually keep my mind on the Lord, and several others. With each gift they spoke wisdom into my life and prayed that I would grow in it.
Over time I hadn’t really considered any other rite of passages although I had wondered why there was only one. Then in the past year I came across something called a Blessingway that the Navajo host for a mother-to-be. It had some similarities to the rite of passage except geared towards the transition from womanhood to motherhood. It was a light bulb moment for me! There are 4 big transitions in a woman’s life (and also a man’s life): girl to woman, woman to wife, wife to mother (even if you are a mother to those you do not birth), mother to grandmother. Each are huge and should be celebrated!
Well, about that time we found out that Ashlee (my sister-in-law) was having their first child so I asked if I could host a special “Mother’s Blessing” (that’s what most of the internet seems to be calling a variation of it) for her. And so we did! We invited special ladies in her family to be a part of her Mother Blessing for a special time in celebrating her transition into motherhood.
If you are looking for some ideas on how to host a Mother’s Blessing, here are the things we did:
- We had a silk cord and bowl of teething beads that went around the circle. As we chatted, each lady picked a pair of beads and strung them on each side. Ashlee got to choose the length so Emersyn will be able to enjoy it as an entertainment across strollers and car seats, diaper changes or just while she is held and wants to chew!
- We all sat around and enjoyed some brunch and answered some fun and serious questions in popcorn style (meaning no turns or order, just anyone speak up any time):
- Tell what a mother blessing is. (This was for the host to start and lead the following questions.)
- What is the funniest/most embarrassing experiences you faced as a new mom?
- What are your favorite memories with your mom?
- What are your favorite things about being a mom?
- What made you want to be a mom?
- What character traits, qualities does the mother-to-be have that make her prepared to be a mother?
- Allow the mother-to-be to share any fears or concerns about labor/delivery or motherhood that we can pray for and encourage her.
- Take time to pray together.
Optional prayer if family is comfortable: write down body parts like head, eyes, mouth, ears, shoulders, hands, belly, knees, feet, etc and give them to each family member to pray over specifically. Such as for the head that the Lord give wisdom, knowledge, and understanding…. Knees for always remembering to kneel in prayer and to never be too busy you cannot stop and kneel to hug your child…. Belly for finding the joy and having great belly laughs, for baby’s health and healthy delivery. Etc. Etc.
3. Each lady brought a homemade freezer meal to help the new parents not have to worry about cooking during those first few weeks of adjustment.
Less is more at this particular celebration. You don’t have to think of so many crafts unless you absolutely want to. You don’t have to even bring gifts since more than likely there was a baby shower and this is focused on the mom. If you do, you can do the freezer meals or a symbolic gift like the gifts mentioned at my first passage. This time is mostly for the mother-to-be to look forward towards this new transition and to feel supported and loved.
For friends that are already mothers but have not had a Mother Blessing, find what might mean the most to them. Maybe just having a couple friends take her for a tea and spa treatment to love on her. Maybe mother and grandmother take her for a special weekend getaway. Or maybe (like I did for another friend of mine), go take over a meal after baby comes with a couple close friends of hers to just spend time and take a jar filled with scriptures, songs to listen too, encouragement, whatever just to help her through some of the tough days. It doesn’t have to be elaborate, just special and memorable! And maybe consider doing something special for those mothers who become grandmothers!
What are some things you think would be special for a Mother’s Blessing?
